tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-138410412024-03-07T04:59:59.277-05:00My Band Name For TodayA faithfully updated stream-of-consciousness band name list. These names are so spectacularly awesome, you may flip out and kick your mom in the head. (c) Mark WynkoopMarkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10172563942171162403noreply@blogger.comBlogger618125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13841041.post-37606966120713584262015-12-03T22:40:00.000-05:002015-12-03T22:40:09.098-05:00The Egg McGuffin<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="MsoBookTitle"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;">What I'm Pitching to Hollywood this week:</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="MsoBookTitle"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="MsoBookTitle"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;">Mac and Me, Too!<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
<span class="MsoBookTitle">The Egg
McGuffin<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Written by… (Kyle Friel, currently suing the WGA for credit
stolen by Mark Wynkoop)<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Story Treatment<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 12.0pt; text-indent: .5in;">
<b>Wheelchair</b>-bound college student <b>Michael Cruise</b> is desperate to get <b>breakfast</b> before his class (where he
does some <b>computer thing</b>). Along with his Mysterious Alien Creature (<b>MAC</b>, who befriended him as a boy), they
come up against endless obstacles, including <b>government</b> <b>agents</b>,
Michel’s <b>suspicious girlfriend</b>, and
an inept “<b>burglar</b>” who is quite a “<b>ham</b>”, as (potentially) portrayed by
Jeremy Piven, Nicholas Cage, Adam Sandler, Ryan Reynolds, Jon Favreau or Johnny
Depp.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 12.0pt; text-indent: .5in;">
Unbeknownst to
them, the <b>McMuffin wrapper</b> is
encrypted with a top-secret <b>quantum code.</b>
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 12.0pt; text-indent: .5in;">
But that’s pretty
complex, so let’s just say the wrapper is a <b>map</b> that leads to <b>some gold</b>. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 12.0pt; text-indent: .5in;">
The
antagonists steal the McMuffin, leading them on a wild chase that returns the
principal characters to McDonald's.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 12.0pt; text-indent: .5in;">
When they
finally arrive, they are crestfallen to learn that <b>breakfast hours are over</b>.
The lifelong chums are reinvigorated, discovering that the McMuffin was
not what they really wanted, but that <b>the
<i>real</i> gold</b> is the friendship they
share inside each of them. In a <b>heartwarming twist of corporate synergy</b>,
the CEO arrives, announcing the new <b>“breakfast
all day” policy</b>.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 12.0pt; text-indent: .5in;">
The film ends
on an upbeat note with an <b>extended dance
sequence</b> set to “<i>I’m a Believer</i>”,
or possibly “<i>Don’t Stop Believin’</i>”. The dance spreads from the upscale McDonald's
to the streets, triumphantly ending with an orbital pan, revealing the Earth
slowly spinning in front of the M-shaped constellation of Cassiopeia. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 12.0pt; text-indent: .5in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 12.0pt; text-indent: .5in;">
<b>Post Credit Stinger:<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 12.0pt; text-indent: .5in;">
A flare from
one of the stars in Cassiopeia heralds the arrival of an <b>evil-looking starship</b>. It
is a <b>bounty hunter</b> sent to return
MAC to his people. The craft lands near
the McDonald's, where the <b>elaborate
dance number</b> is <b>ongoing</b>. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 12.0pt; text-indent: .5in;">
The “Burgher”
bounty hunter (or possibly “King” bounty hunter, or possibly both) sneaks to
the perimeter of the bushes, in order to grab MAC. —Suddenly, <b>Samuel L. Jackson</b> steps from behind a tree and shoots the <b>sneaky king</b> with a <b>complex ray gun</b>. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 12.0pt; text-indent: .5in;">
<b>Whip-pan</b> to a close up of <b>Jackson</b>, fading to black as he quips “<b>I’m in <u>this</u>, too.</b>”<o:p></o:p></div>
<br />
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<br /></div>
Markhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10172563942171162403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13841041.post-70616815509481738012015-09-30T15:09:00.002-04:002015-09-30T15:09:27.816-04:00<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://ecycler.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/08/vhs-tapes-pile.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://ecycler.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/08/vhs-tapes-pile.jpg" height="393" width="640" /></a></div>
<br />
<ul>
<li>VHS Death March</li>
<li>The Vidalia Sandbar Fight</li>
<li><i><a href="http://www.mst3kinfo.com/ward_e/listdale.html" target="_blank"> I Thought You Were Dale</a></i></li>
<li>Jackie Coogan Mellencamp</li>
</ul>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://pdxretro.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/COOGAN-ADAMS-FAM_thumb.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://pdxretro.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/COOGAN-ADAMS-FAM_thumb.jpg" height="150" width="200" /></a></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
Markhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10172563942171162403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13841041.post-81020759610723399212015-09-17T14:06:00.001-04:002015-09-17T14:06:48.337-04:00My band names for today:<br />
<a href="http://spot-on-collector.com/DISNEY%20SETS/POOH03.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://spot-on-collector.com/DISNEY%20SETS/POOH03.jpg" height="191" width="320" /></a>
<br />
<br />
<ul>
<li>Northern Cities Vowel Shift</li>
<li>The Ill-Considered Shrugs</li>
<li>Clowns of Science</li>
<li>Poo Bus</li>
<li>A Lifetime of Bicentennial Quarters</li>
<li>The Killer Dillons*<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
</li>
</ul>
<div>
<i>* Yes, this is a <b>Three Stooges </b>reference. Don't be a big palooka, you mugs. </i></div>
<div>
<i><br /></i></div>
<div>
<i>The poo bus was an unsuccessful UK attempt at running a bus on, uh, let's say "bio-fuel". Who could have predicted... </i><br />
<i><br /></i></div>
<div>
<i>Aw, I don't have it in me. Write your own jokes. </i></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/1/18/1976_Bicentennial_Quarter_Rev.png" imageanchor="1" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="196" src="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/1/18/1976_Bicentennial_Quarter_Rev.png" width="200" /></a></div>
<div>
<i><br /></i>
<i>When I was a very small child, I heard about the new "</i>Bicentennial Quarter<i>" design. I told my parents about how the back side would feature a <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Little_Drummer_Boy">little drummer boy</a>. </i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>They laughed and laughed.</i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>Probably saved me from a severe dalliance with numismatism. Thanks Mom and Dad. Thanks for laughing at me.</i></div>
Markhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10172563942171162403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13841041.post-87534525240763588452015-08-11T22:08:00.002-04:002015-08-11T22:08:51.906-04:00My Band Name For Today:<br />
<br />
<div>
<ul>
<li>Bad Blooming Algae</li>
</ul>
<div>
You may have noticed I haven't posted for a couple weeks. I've been away constructing a yurt.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<a href="http://si.wsj.net/public/resources/images/OB-YC030_0706Al_H_20130705042531.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://si.wsj.net/public/resources/images/OB-YC030_0706Al_H_20130705042531.jpg" height="425" width="640" /></a></div>
</div>
Markhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10172563942171162403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13841041.post-77836363992926498922012-04-14T15:26:00.000-04:002012-04-14T15:26:28.998-04:00Band Name ArchaeologyFound a note page the other day with a bunch of band names scribbled on it (during a cross-country flight, IIRC).<br />
Warning: They might be repeats. You decide.
Here Goes:<br />
<br />
<br />
<ul>
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjgB7S2k-w1eBMyE9JlXLA9Jd5oXupPfZVK7Lp-kO0yzsUsmXhszqiJmdH-XV9h6WnUK6-dKqcvL1V3yvVNQDmvHmOiPYMw_mi_MHJRzUeM_n-BtRPRx7vOWzk64b8W0tFlyUvJ/s1600/IMG_20120414_152219.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="239" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjgB7S2k-w1eBMyE9JlXLA9Jd5oXupPfZVK7Lp-kO0yzsUsmXhszqiJmdH-XV9h6WnUK6-dKqcvL1V3yvVNQDmvHmOiPYMw_mi_MHJRzUeM_n-BtRPRx7vOWzk64b8W0tFlyUvJ/s320/IMG_20120414_152219.jpg" width="320" /></a>
<li>Root Lifter</li>
<li>Meta Balls</li>
<li>Knob Hill (pretty sure they already exist)</li>
<li>Nuclear Whipping Boy</li>
<li>The Monotremes</li>
<li>Sterile Panda</li>
</ul>
<br />
<br />
<b>Note 1: </b>You can tell how old this is via letterhead analysis. US Monolithics doesn't exist anymore. They were bought out by VIASAT.<br />
<b>Note 2: </b>Also, look how I misspelled "nuclear" on the note. Enjoy.<br />
<br />
<h2>
Bonus:</h2>
Another edition of<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><b>Terms That Don't Mean What I Think They Do</b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><b><br /></b></span><br />
<br />
<ul>
<li>Rump Parliament</li>
</ul>
<br />
<br />Markhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10172563942171162403noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13841041.post-80883309672804589322011-10-07T11:36:00.001-04:002011-10-07T11:36:50.385-04:00<div><p>Liquid Infection</p>
</div>Markhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10172563942171162403noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13841041.post-70041217923339216032011-08-29T21:44:00.006-04:002011-08-29T21:56:13.981-04:00A Short Scene for Two Juvenile Actresses*<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSQ0_dRIFuj2bUxNIsw4TOyGUtie-UMfOAP-KE2Me1qmNuUvJri0Q6yxu5ARGaWWXbKuObF2HYqvSFd_EuU0i-dFN-z3PlrEwwsmJGTYSpEi8xD09mnSvIT6KOXAWTznod2tud/s1600/actress.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 172px; height: 235px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSQ0_dRIFuj2bUxNIsw4TOyGUtie-UMfOAP-KE2Me1qmNuUvJri0Q6yxu5ARGaWWXbKuObF2HYqvSFd_EuU0i-dFN-z3PlrEwwsmJGTYSpEi8xD09mnSvIT6KOXAWTznod2tud/s320/actress.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5646461562788005938" /></a>
<br /><div>
<br /></div><div>* And I use the decidedly un-P.C. term "Actresses" quite advisedly. </div><div></div><blockquote><div>
<br /></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><b>Teen 1 (dictating):</b> "I believe I should be elected to student government because I enjoy helping people and the community..."</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >
<br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><b>Teen 2 (stops typing): </b>"No you don't!"</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><b>
<br /></b></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><b>Teen 1: </b>"SHUT UP, Rachel!!!"</span></div><div>
<br /></div><div></div></blockquote><div>
<br /></div>Markhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10172563942171162403noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13841041.post-45365188164553068992011-08-18T22:18:00.001-04:002011-08-18T22:21:17.318-04:00<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHE3mAR61kbLEPu3uRi4QZg0dV8A9_UKkZKXn7ek1lfvph6kh5-ZN-CsEbbMtqQEgnR7XPr91qv08pvrQzDLvLb7BtUVLPFFr32JcIguox7xNnCJD7KjZeRcopslEiJoC8YpZv/s1600/yoyo+girl+cop.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 283px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHE3mAR61kbLEPu3uRi4QZg0dV8A9_UKkZKXn7ek1lfvph6kh5-ZN-CsEbbMtqQEgnR7XPr91qv08pvrQzDLvLb7BtUVLPFFr32JcIguox7xNnCJD7KjZeRcopslEiJoC8YpZv/s400/yoyo+girl+cop.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5642385354554234690" /></a>
<br /><ul><li>Emotional Eating </li><li>Tapetum Lucidum </li><li>A Destructive Sense of Ownership </li><li>Yo-Yo Sexy Girl Cop
<br /></li><li>Planck Time</li></ul><div>I would never get a piercing or a tattoo, but when genetic engineering kicks into full throttle, I'm totally going for human tapetum lucidum. You can call me "Bright Eyes".</div><div>
<br /></div><div>BTW, "<a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Planck_time">Planck Time</a>" has nothing to do with planking, the big internet hit of, oh about 4 years ago. Read a book, you freaks. </div>Markhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10172563942171162403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13841041.post-9508245914986572502011-08-09T21:22:00.000-04:002011-08-09T22:02:15.324-04:00<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigFQdLLe07vSbWFJIhdyumlf_rcesWA1cQbbgFHcY5ofQc5_qU5_BmVmZKmfRY9hQiHTiC6fRUxV7gbUfNUuv2AEptAjMw-RcI8uNl-Q_jcLAydCFBTD4yf0ZUu8_Xgnr8yYsc/s1600/rockwell.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 189px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigFQdLLe07vSbWFJIhdyumlf_rcesWA1cQbbgFHcY5ofQc5_qU5_BmVmZKmfRY9hQiHTiC6fRUxV7gbUfNUuv2AEptAjMw-RcI8uNl-Q_jcLAydCFBTD4yf0ZUu8_Xgnr8yYsc/s200/rockwell.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5639041654017209810" /></a>
<br /><ul><li>Damaged Manatees </li><li><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rockwell_scale">Rockwell Hardness</a></li><li>Hex Shank Bits</li><li>Rotten Pants</li></ul><div>The Rockwell scale is my geek comedy gift to you.</div>Markhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10172563942171162403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13841041.post-4178446748685286472011-06-21T20:35:00.001-04:002011-06-22T03:11:42.235-04:00<ul><li>Teenage Science Prodigy </li><li>Person Head </li><li>The Misery Index </li><li>Unimaginative Sports Metaphor </li></ul>Markhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10172563942171162403noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13841041.post-10745931114811611992011-05-29T21:34:00.003-04:002011-05-29T21:49:08.815-04:00What I'm Pitching This Week<a href="http://www.70slivekidvid.com/mcduff/waltermcd2.jpg"><img style="MARGIN: 0px 0px 10px 10px; WIDTH: 320px; FLOAT: right; HEIGHT: 235px; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://www.70slivekidvid.com/mcduff/waltermcd2.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><div><strong>Untitled Lifetime TV Project:</strong><br /><br /><blockquote><strong>Slug line:</strong> A former ghost must save her sick robot daughter's talking dog when tragically romantic vampire ninja assassins move into the neighborhood.<br /></blockquote></div><br /><div><br /><p></p>--Call me! Vivendi expressed a lot of interest in this, but we'd like to go with <u>you</u>.</div>Markhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10172563942171162403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13841041.post-6585992864070705552011-05-19T22:50:00.001-04:002011-05-19T22:51:58.627-04:00Classy until the very end.My buddy Clive says he wants to leave this world the same way he came into it: A single gunshot wound to the face.Markhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10172563942171162403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13841041.post-89350722797516446602011-05-11T16:23:00.000-04:002011-05-13T16:22:39.330-04:00<ul><br /><li>Danks & Briscoe</li><br /><li>Diagnosticity</li><br /><li>Iso-LOW-cate</li><br /><li>Schemata-Mo-Graph</li></ul>Markhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10172563942171162403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13841041.post-10078537880782900542011-05-04T11:13:00.000-04:002011-05-04T12:50:01.437-04:00<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/2/2e/Dog_philtrum.png"><img style="float: right; margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; cursor: pointer; width: 357px; height: 357px;" src="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/2/2e/Dog_philtrum.png" alt="" border="0" /></a><br /><ul><li>Dog Philtrum</li><li>Flap Consonant</li><li>The Base Rate of Bears </li><li>Byzantine Iconoclasm</li><li>Nail Rain</li></ul>Markhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10172563942171162403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13841041.post-46441847687922705412011-04-22T06:25:00.000-04:002011-04-22T17:58:53.567-04:00<ul><li>Specific Dream Rabbit</li><li>Companion Airfare</li><li>God's Vodka</li><li>Weird Science Hero</li><li>Coreflood Botnet*</li></ul>* from news story "Department of Justice and FBI Take Down Huge Coreflood Botnet"Markhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10172563942171162403noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13841041.post-57859843383673242722011-02-19T12:17:00.002-05:002011-02-19T12:24:23.883-05:00<div><b>Mark Wynkoop</b> is a man of many moods and many lethal karate moves, which he formulated on a ski weekend in Paradox Colorado. He was born to string words together and slip them inside your sexy brain. </div><div><br /></div><div><b>What I'm Listening to:</b></div><div>When You See (Those Flying Saucers) - The Buchanan Brothers</div><div><br /></div><div><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal; "><div><b>What I'm Thinking: </b></div><div>Many aspiring writers take the injunction to "write what you know" entirely too seriously, resulting in numerous bad novels about English professors contemplating adultery.</div></span></b></div><div><b><br /></b></div><div><b>What I'm Quoting:</b></div><div>"Vagueness is at times necessary and mystery is never in short supply, but I dont think they're anything to worship. Genuine science and mathematical precision are more intriguing than are the "facts" published in supermarket tabloids or romantic innumeracy which fosters credulity, stunts skepticism, and dulls one to real imponderables."</div><div><i>--Innumeracy: Mathematical Illiteracy and Its Consequences</i> </div><div><i>John Allen</i></div><div><br /></div>Markhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10172563942171162403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13841041.post-83486270688796923252011-02-08T18:59:00.001-05:002011-02-08T18:59:00.545-05:00<ul><li>R-complex </li><li>Reptilian Brain Dance</li><li>Krasnikov Tube<br /></li><li><i> In Medias Res</i><br /></li></ul>Markhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10172563942171162403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13841041.post-72721797694185206492011-02-03T19:41:00.002-05:002011-02-03T19:46:20.574-05:00Wheel of Fortune Questions continued.Okay, so I've determined that you only have to pay once, no matter how many of your selected vowels exist. I'm not 100% sure, but I think that's how it works.<div><br /></div><div>My next question: Sometimes people spin the wheel and it lands on cards with prizes like trips or high dollar amounts. When this happens, they remove the card and keep it. Yet they rarely (never) seem to win the million dollars or the trip. Whats up with that?</div>Markhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10172563942171162403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13841041.post-11353297441016822672011-02-01T19:48:00.001-05:002011-02-01T19:48:00.744-05:00Wheel of Fortune Questions (Second in a Series)Okay, so NateF24C (via Internet) tells me that a vowel costs $250. <div><br /></div><div>NateF24C (if that is your real name), thanks. I pity you.</div><div><br /></div><div>Now my second question- Say I buy an "E" and there are eight "E"s. Does that mean it just cost me a cool two grand? </div><div><br /></div><div> If so, that's horrible. Instead of cheering when a requested vowel appears, people should groan.</div>Markhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10172563942171162403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13841041.post-9345015781781406822011-01-31T19:43:00.002-05:002011-01-31T19:48:11.070-05:00Hey, Internet, I have a question:<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYPXH_2bt6YbbQmdpZVaaynOFOlH4_EU1O7yvljFMq7f6nYIE34DfwabEBcxr8wiPCIQuk9nW1CJn4iaE0WrV2c2q1CyBJKO0ZALH8G9aAj6ETUhrLwU1m88P6LWqLkgkPzB4P/s1600/wheel.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 225px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYPXH_2bt6YbbQmdpZVaaynOFOlH4_EU1O7yvljFMq7f6nYIE34DfwabEBcxr8wiPCIQuk9nW1CJn4iaE0WrV2c2q1CyBJKO0ZALH8G9aAj6ETUhrLwU1m88P6LWqLkgkPzB4P/s400/wheel.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5568516347981152962" /></a><br />How much does it cost to buy a vowel on "Wheel of Fortune"? <div><br /></div><div>I take it back. If you really know the answer to that, you probably wouldn't like to hang out with cynical hipster dirtbag guys like us.</div>Markhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10172563942171162403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13841041.post-26110550863545323312011-01-17T22:34:00.002-05:002011-01-20T23:02:27.924-05:00<ul><li>The Stingless Bees of Ireland<br /></li><li>Rigged Ticket Lottery<br /></li><li>Wave of Sniffles</li><li>Hurricane Hazel</li><li>Normal Judy </li></ul>Markhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10172563942171162403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13841041.post-20516233065513500792011-01-12T21:01:00.006-05:002011-01-12T21:33:27.381-05:00The Final Word on the 3 Men And A Baby Ghost Controversy<div><b><br /></b></div><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8-tfjvg39rLS0iGeqB9K1mSj3013NTpDsvEtzclSFJ5ovijZbyKVXEqhpefpRX5_db0_QFSNEpRBtxtej7215QdcvdxFGSHGjC6X8TwYKd0IuVByEpCb7U1eBM6qKE1bwf9mk/s1600/3_men_and_a_ghost.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 293px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8-tfjvg39rLS0iGeqB9K1mSj3013NTpDsvEtzclSFJ5ovijZbyKVXEqhpefpRX5_db0_QFSNEpRBtxtej7215QdcvdxFGSHGjC6X8TwYKd0IuVByEpCb7U1eBM6qKE1bwf9mk/s400/3_men_and_a_ghost.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5561490497790440754" /><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-decorations-in-effect: none; "></span></a><br />I just saw the "ghost scene" in "3 men and a baby" for the first time since the original theatrical run. (See, because I'm really old.)<div><br />At any rate, I am still <b><i>shaking </i></b>with terror! Not because of the ghost. But because I'm so old.<br /><br /></div><div>Anyway, celebrated actress Celeste Holm and the entire film crew denies the whole "ghost" thing. </div><div><br /></div><div>--How typical. Another glaring example of Big Hollywood pushing their<b> rationalist empirical skepticism agenda</b>.<div><br /></div><div>But the whole thing does lead to one of my favorite messages from an online message board in years. "kaf-14" posts the following:</div><span class="Apple-style-span"><blockquote><span class="Apple-style-span" >>> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium; ">T</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium; ">he truth is that Celeste Holm was forced to deny this, as the ghost had already threatened her and the other stars in the movie on many occasions.</span></span></blockquote><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium; "></span></span></div>Markhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10172563942171162403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13841041.post-76986863309750984582011-01-11T06:33:00.000-05:002011-01-10T22:56:23.000-05:00The Monkeys You Ordered are Here<ul><li>A Nation Of Fillions </li><li>Naked Allusion<br /></li><li>The Fossicking Rucksacks<br /></li><li>The Monkeys You Ordered<br /></li><li>Internet Bacon </li></ul>Markhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10172563942171162403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13841041.post-73527453709319250932011-01-10T06:21:00.000-05:002011-01-10T22:49:37.737-05:00<div><ul><li>Gum Paste Flowers</li><li>The Bob Ross Joy of Painting Extravaganza </li><li>Cogito Eggo sum (I think, therefore I'm a waffle) </li><li>Cialis Doesn't Live Here any More </li><li>The Bonks </li></ul></div>Markhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10172563942171162403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13841041.post-78886079546213635602011-01-09T18:50:00.003-05:002011-01-06T20:30:01.666-05:00<ul><li><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mother_liquor">Syrupy Mother Liqueur</a> *</li><li>Jack Makes Nick Doubt Victor</li><li>Pizza Blot </li></ul><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div>* Ran across "Syrupy Mother Liqueur" in a sugar documentary. Yes. Sugar documentary.</div><div><br /></div><div>"Syrupy Mother Liqueur" sounds hilarious when you say it out loud. Lucky for me, the narrator said it over and over, which became amusing to my girlfriend after awhile. </div><div><br /></div><div>It sounds like something us kids would have called each other in public school.</div>Markhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10172563942171162403noreply@blogger.com0