2007-08-29
Cube's Rubric
- Uncanny Valley
- Sweet Sassy Molassy
- The Bra Extenders
- Water Engine
- Nature's Harmonic Time Cube
It says so right on the package.
Moving right along, if you are familiar with the bizarre fever dream that is the so-called "time cube" (click here to read about it from the safety of Wikipedia) , then we can mourn the loss of our innocence's together.
I remember seeing this stuff before in the late 90's. I'm amazed the guy has persisted (thrived, even!) without being institutionalized.
I'm delighted that the anonymous Wikipedia contributer notes, "Ray's use of the word 'simultaneous' does not appear to refer to a meaning other than the accepted one. However, he fails to make any logically coherent explanation as to how different periods of time that are taking place 'simultaneously' can be counted separately and added together..."
Here is the original site. The old guy (Gene Ray, who has two first names--always a good sign) presents himself as certifiably insane.
If you don't find the racism or intellectual fallaciousness personally offensive, you can feel generally offended that he calls for the death of everyone who is "ignorant"of the time cube, which, lets face it, is everybody but Gene Ray himself.
I submit to you this alternate site, a web page with a PHP script that generates a random "time cube" webpage. Understandably, the stuff it comes up with makes as much or more sense than the original site.
And here is a parody site, "NINTENDO'S PORTABLE SIMULTANEOUS 4-PLAYER GAME CUBE".
Comments:
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Now I'm wheezing I laughed so hard; thanks! That and a beer is what I needed.
And I nominate:
Gene Ray
as an alternate band name for today.
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And I nominate:
Gene Ray
as an alternate band name for today.
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