- Racking Focus
- Big Time Mustard Production
- The Beamsplitting Pellicles
- Rice Parameter
- The Crystalline Entity
- Lighter Fluid Donut
- Backyard Dentist
- Slausen's Lost Oasis
- Johnny Brassbuttons
- Frozen Sausage to the Head
- The Ghost of Flooz
- Force Lightning
- The Last Subscriber
Have I mentioned that I've got like a hundred thousand dollars worth of uncashed Flooz? Will anybody accept it in exchange for goods or services? Whoopi? Anybody?
The Internets Hate Me
- Exploding Bear
- King Toe
- The Flynn Effect
- Preteen Thugs
- Flatulent Robot
"King Toe" is an actual brand of work boot which you can (probably) purchase on the Internets. I will never know. The Internets Hate Me.
Interoffice emails that raise more questions than they answer
Let me preface this by saying that I don't work in one of those hip TV-style freewheeling offices. I work with old people who think that electricity is a fad.
Subject: PieThere is something so unhip-it's-cool about that pie poll*.
If everyone emails me their favorite type of pie, I will bring in the pie with the highest votes tomorrow.
In fact its so cool, it makes me kind of suspicious.
I give "Pie" today's honorary Admiral Akbar "It's a Trap!" award.
* Good thing it wasn't a pot pie poll. And that Khmer Rouge despot Pol Pot wasn't involved in the pot pie poll.
- Puzzle Car
- Hanging Indent
- Petticoat Dungeon
- Rusty Bolt Effect
- Mop Replacement Head
The Inedible Moment
Word Jazz for the Internet Age
"What did you say? It was a what moment?"
"I couldn't believe that scene," she said. "it was a pretty inedible moment."
"inedible moment. I thought it was a really inedible moment."I had been through this before with her.
I knew better than to try.
But that didn't stop me. "'inedible'? Are you sure that's what you want?"
"Inedible. I'll never forget it.""Whatever. I guess you're entitled to your uniformed opinion."
Erykah Badu in the news again
What? You say she's a musician, not a skater?
--Never heard of her.