My Band Name For Today

Welcome to my Band Name Blog. It Stinks!

Here are your band names for today:

• Geometric Nucleus
• The Identity Thieves
• Tryptophan Haze
• The Roddenberry's*
• Idiot Control Now
  

*"Roddenberry's" could either be a Monster Cereal or a 70's era Partridge Family style band that travels the country in a Star Trek themed van, singing Osmond-style music (wearing crushed velor mini-dresses, of course).

Yesterday was our Thanksgiving Holiday in the USA. One of the highlights of the annual Macy's Parade was the amazing live Rick-Rolling of the Cartoon Network float, featuring a real-life appearance by the well-preserved Rick Astley.

I admire the chutzpah of the Cartoon Network writers, who probably couldn't bring themselves to deliver another lame Banana Splits/Muppets production number, and asked the "what-if" question that led them to (what I guess to be) the first live Rick Roll.

I like the fact that maybe 10% of the parade audience will understand the joke. Although Britons treat the Rick Roll with typical Anglican ennui , I see a whole new career for Astley, showing up live to Rick Roll corporate and civic evens here in the States.

Cartoon Network seems to be able to get out of the way to let writers do some truly innovative work. It's the place I'd like to write this decade.

If I didn't already earn more money than a Cartoon Network writer.

Enjoy some fake band names. Posters on theOnion.com comments boards, I see that you are ripping off my fake band names and calling them your own. Shame, shame. It's easy to tell when you just take the lists in the same order I uploaded them three years ago.

Your band names for today:

• Air Smash
  
• Super-Generic
• Softly Softly Catchee Monkey
• Mutant Tricycle Boy
• Encyclopedia of Suck
  

Your band names for today:

• Milwaukee Protocol
• Internet Death Hoax
• 6809 GCC Patch
• Dead or Canadian?
• Scytale (Rhymes with Italy)

Someone asked if the band's name was just "Scytale", or if it was "Scytale (Rhymes with Italy)" [in whole]. I prefer the whole thing, but if you're just a "Scytale" fan, so be it.

Originally I had planned to follow-up the "Dave Barry" post from September with a retraction, saying that I was unaware that he had died a few years ago (coincident with his semi-retirement), but I decided that it was uncharacteristically mean-spirited for this blog.

I've learned my lesson with Internet Death Hoaxes. From now on, the only death I'm going to fake is my own.

• Deal Toy
• Hapax Legomenon
• Thunder Bucket
• Werner Klemperer's Other Hat
• Señor M.C.P.
  

I like the fact that "Hapax Legomenon" has nothing to do with Lego men. This Blog is full of Hapax Legomenon.

By the way. Maybe "Hapax Armymenon" would be a better band name.

My current art installation project is a Planet of Army Men, against a nebula backdrop, and lit internally. A mockup appears on this page.

It qualifies as contemporary art because it is transgressive, yet it is an equal opportunity offender. The truth is, I just thought a giant globe of plastic army men would be visually arresting (read "look cool".).

Its this kind of candor that keeps me at arm's length from the "serious" art establishment. If I make a statement that reassures them that their hand-me-down sensibilities are edge-popular, then its art. If I just create awesome imagery, then its mere illustration.

Sigh.

(Yes, that's supposed to be Africa, Europe and Asia there. The Azores are huge and there is no UK or Greenland to be seen. Give me a break. Its a work in progress.)

• Commie Motorcycle
  
• Chicksy Dix
• Black Drop Effect
• The Fleeting Expletives
• Ney Flute

And a special "Community" section. Band names with the word "community" in them.

• Community Scissors
• Community Spatula
• Community Speculum

I can't explain more about the Scissors right now. Someday I hope to reveal the shocking true story, surrounded by a spooky background like the "Criswell Predicts" introduction from "Plan 9 from Outer Space".

• The Swear Jars
  
• The Bakken Formation
• Harm Hides at Home
• Leadbeater's Possum
• Attractive Nuisance

Today's Band Name is:

• Fake Corporate Blogger

I'd like to officially offer my services for hire as a Fake Corporate Blogger now that I've rated with the blog analysis service BlogScope!

BlogScope recently ranked my blog. They provided me with a list of the most popular keywords. Keywords which folks like you commonly search this humble web log.

These lists of words are called "clouds" for reasons that are hazy and ill-defined--just like a cloud. --Hey!

My very own "cloud" includes some puzzlers. Allow me to compare *my* keyword cloud against the most popular cloud:

Most popular Blog keyword cloud:

Paris
Hilton
Naked

My Band Names keyword cloud:

band
name
could
they
you
called
marroquin
get
lafontaine

Nice to see that folks are getting the search results they want on my blog for popular terms such as "you", "they", "get" and "could".

At least the late great Don Lafontain gets some mileage.

But what the heck's a "marroquin"? Have I ever even blogged that word a single time? Is it some kind of South American lagomorph or something?

Before I go, I'd like to leave you with an extra-inning band name. Your Blogscope-approved additional band name for today is:

• Paris Hilton Naked